Aayushi Agarwalla-Panda

I stopped holding opinions as confidently as I once did. Not intentionally, just gradually. When every thought passes through the filter of “Is this good enough?” or “Will this make me look foolish?” you begin to censor yourself before the world ever does. Negative self-talk doesn’t just chip away at confidence; it narrows you. It shrinks your spontaneity. It makes you second-guess your own inner world.

Grief made me more aware of the people around me. I noticed small changes in moods, silences, and unspoken emotions. At the same time, I kept going with my own life. I followed routines. I met expectations. From the outside, everything looked fine. Inside, I felt tired in a way rest didn’t seem to fix.

Depression also brings thoughts that sadness usually doesn’t. People with depression often feel hopeless, worthless, or guilty for no clear reason. These thoughts can be intense and long-lasting, and mental health research shows they’re part of the disorder—not a person’s fault or something they can simply “snap out of.”